What Guys Want in a Relationship

What Guys Want blog cover

Ahh, the age-old question that has perplexed women for centuries: what do guys want? Well, there isn’t an exact answer to this question because every guy is different. But the good news is that there are definitely general qualities that guys tend to look for in a partner. In this article, we will uncover the mystery of what guys want and share some insights into their minds.

What guys want in a relationship

So, what is it that guys really want in a relationship? Here are some common qualities that guys look for.

1. Respect

Men value respect in a relationship because it affirms their sense of dignity and worth. Feeling respected by a partner contributes to a positive self-image and reinforces a sense of being valued. When a man likes a woman, being respected by her is everything to him.

Respect is essentially having a high opinion of someone and treating them as if they are important. In other words, acknowledging their value. This means listening to what he has to say, taking his opinions into account, and showing appreciation for his thoughts, feelings, and efforts. Disrespecting a man is the quickest way to push him away. Whether that’s rolling your eyes at him, talking over him, or blatantly ignoring his input, these actions convey that you don’t value what he brings to the world.

2. Appreciation

Appreciation is another core element in a relationship that men crave. Feeling appreciated not only makes them feel good, but it also motivates them to continue putting in effort and making their partner happy. Showing gratitude for the little things that your partner does can go a long way in strengthening your bond.

Men often feel like they are expected to provide and take care of their partners, so showing appreciation for those efforts can make them feel like everything they are doing is worthwhile. So next time your guy does something for you, whether it’s taking you out for dinner or fixing something around the house, make sure to let him know how much you appreciate it.

3. Trust

Men need to know they have your trust. They need to feel like you trust their decisions and actions in a relationship—that they make you feel safe and that you know they can handle situations that pop up. Trust signals respect because it lets them know that you believe in them, their abilities, and their character. It works both ways. So next time your wondering about what guys want, remember this.

Of course, trust is something that has to be earned. You wouldn’t automatically trust someone you just met, and the same goes for a relationship. It takes time to build trust, but there are simple ways to show your partner that you trust them. For example, asking for help or advice can convey that you value their opinion and trust their judgment. In addition to men wanting you to trust them, they also want to be able to trust their partner, of course. It works both ways.

4. Kindness

Kindness from a partner creates a nurturing and supportive environment. It helps to create a safe space where a man can be vulnerable without fear of judgment or criticism. Being kind to your partner also indicates that you care about their feelings and well-being. When considering what guys want, this is essential.

Simple acts of kindness, such as showing affection, doing something thoughtful for your partner, or just being there for them when they need someone to talk to, can make a significant impact on the overall happiness of a relationship. Kindness consistently comes out as one of the top qualities that both men and women look for in a long-term partner.

5. Connection

Connection is essential in any relationship. It’s the glue that keeps the relationship strong and thriving. Men want to feel emotionally connected to their partner, which means being able to share their thoughts, feelings, and vulnerabilities without fear of judgment or rejection. Connection is a core human need, and feeling a sense of emotional intimacy with a romantic partner is a must for men.

Connection is also about feeling like you are on the same wavelength. It’s about being able to talk to each other about anything and everything. This connection can be built through communication, spending quality time together, and actively listening to each other.

6. Acceptance

Feeling truly accepted for who they are is critical for men in a relationship. When a man feels accepted, he can let down his guard and be himself. Acceptance includes embracing each other’s flaws and imperfections and not trying to change the other person. It’s about loving each other for who you both are, not who you want each other to be.

It’s true that healthy relationships involve personal growth and improvement. But feedback should come from a place of love and acceptance rather than trying to mold someone into an idealized version. Feeling accepted enables authenticity, and you need to be able to be your true self with your partner for a relationship to thrive. Both men and women experience pressure to fit into certain societal norms, so finding someone who loves and accepts you for who you are is a beautiful thing.

7. Understanding

Feeling understood ties in with feeling accepted in the sense that you have to feel understood in order to feel truly accepted. Essentially, feeling understood is more about knowing that your partner knows you on a deep level. Perhaps they know why you react a certain way or can finish your sentences. Or maybe it’s just that they get your sense of humor or understand what makes you happy.

When a man feels understood, he feels validated and seen. It’s an essential aspect of emotional intimacy in a relationship. Healthy relationships involve both partners making an effort to truly understand each other. It might take time and effort, but that’s part of the beauty of it.

8. Support

One of the most significant qualities men look for in a relationship is support. This can include emotional, physical, and practical support. Men want to know that they have someone in their corner who believes in them and will be there to help them through difficult times.

Support also means being each other’s biggest cheerleaders and encouraging one another to pursue their passions and goals. A supportive partner can make all the difference in a man’s life. It can give them the confidence to take on new challenges and achieve their dreams. Support is a key factor when considering what guys want.

9. Physical attraction

Men are visual creatures, and physical attraction is often a significant factor in a relationship. It’s not just about looks, but the way a person carries themselves, their energy, and their confidence. At the end of the day, physical attraction is a natural and instinctive part of most romantic relationships.

For men, their partner’s physical attraction to them is equally important. They need to feel desired and wanted. Men want to know that their partner finds them desirable. Feeling wanted can boost a man’s self-esteem and make him feel more connected to his partner. Nurturing physical intimacy helps to keep the spark alive and confirms that you are attracted to your partner on a physical level.

Kissing couple

10. Boundaries

Men with a healthy mentality find boundaries attractive in a relationship. Setting boundaries shows that you value your own needs and feelings and aren’t willing to compromise certain standards or values for the sake of the relationship. Boundaries also create a sense of safety and security in a relationship, as both partners know where the limits are.

A real man wants a woman with self-respect, and this involves saying no when something goes against your values. It also shows a level of maturity and emotional intelligence, both of which are attractive qualities in a partner. Of course, if your boundaries are incompatible with your partner’s, that indicates that the relationship isn’t the right fit. But that’s a matter of incompatibility.

11. Passion

Having a passion for life and pursuing your interests is a universally attractive quality. It shows that you have a meaningful life outside of the relationship and a sense of independence. Men want to be with someone who is passionate about something, whether it’s their career, hobbies, or causes they believe in. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a shared passion, but seeing someone light up when they talk about something they love can be incredibly attractive.

Passion also goes hand in hand with having a positive attitude. Men are attracted to women who have a zest for life and approach things with enthusiasm and optimism. Passion can also be contagious, and seeing your partner thriving in their passions can inspire you to do the same. The opposite of passion is apathy, which can quickly kill a relationship. So keep that fire burning!

12. Compatibility

If a man is looking for a long-term relationship, compatibility is a crucial factor. Compatibility goes beyond just having similar values and complementary lifestyles. it also involves needing a similar level of communication, being able to navigate conflicts in a healthy way, and having a shared vision for the future.

Compatibility isn’t about finding someone who is exactly like you but rather someone with whom you can work well in the long run. If connection is the glue that holds relationships together, compatibility is the foundation that keeps it stable. It paves the way for a fulfilling, lasting relationship. Compatibility can mean wildly different things to different people, depending on factors such as values, lifestyle, personality, past experience, and aspirations.

13. Emotional stability

Emotional stability is a highly attractive quality in both men and women. It involves being able to regulate your emotions, which feeds into how you handle stress, conflicts, challenges, unpredictability, and even excitement. In a relationship, emotional stability often ties in with being able to communicate calmly and effectively, as well as not lashing out or getting overly defensive.

When someone is emotionally stable, it gives the relationship a sense of peace and security. It also means that when things get rough, they can handle it in a mature way and not let their emotions completely take over. On top of that, it indicates that they can be supportive to their partner when they need it.

14. Honesty

Honesty is fundamental to any healthy, lasting relationship. For men, honesty isn’t just about telling the truth when asked but also about beingproactively transparent. It’s about being upfront about one’s thoughts, feelings, and intentions. Being honest with your partner also means being true to yourself and not pretending to be someone you’re not.

In a relationship, showing consistent honesty over time cultivates trust. When your partner communicates honestly, it shows respect for the individual and the relationship. It’s a way of saying, “I value you enough to be honest with you, even if it’s difficult.” On the other hand, dishonesty in any form, such as lying or hiding information, can erode trust and damage the relationship very quickly. Trust takes time to build, but it can be destroyed in an instant.

15. Affection

Affection is another important aspect of a romantic relationship. Men want to feel loved and cared for, just like anyone else. Showing affection can come in many forms, from physical touch and words of affirmation to acts of service and quality time together.

Affection is essential for maintaining a strong bond and keeping the relationship fulfilling. It’s also a way of expressing gratitude, appreciation, and admiration for your partner. As we have discussed, men want to know that they are valued in the relationship, and affection is one of the ways to convey that message.

What men want

16. Autonomy

Men typically value their independence and autonomy. They want to feel free to make their own decisions and have their own space. This doesn’t mean they don’t want or need a partner. It also doesn’t mean that they don’t value their partner’s opinions and input. It simply means that they want to maintain their sense of self and not feel suffocated or controlled in a relationship.

Having a partner who respects your autonomy can be incredibly attractive. It shows that you trust each other, have healthy boundaries, and are secure in the relationship. In fact, being able to give each other space and maintain individual identities can also help to keep the spark alive. Finding that balance of independence and togetherness isn’t always easy, but it makes a huge impact on the success of a relationship.

17. Inspiration

One of the qualities that men find most magical in a partner is the ability to inspire them. Having someone who inspires you to be the best version of yourself is a special feeling. The desire to live up to your own potential can be heightened when you want to be a positive influence on your partner and your relationship. It gives more meaning to life.

This naturally happens for a lot of men when they deeply care about their partner. It often motivates them to work harder, become more self-aware, and strive for personal growth. When you want to ensure that your partner has the best life possible, you strive to make an effort in all areas of life.

Final thoughts on what guys want

Overall, what men want in a relationship is both universal and unique. It’s both simple and complex. It’s both constant and evolving. Different men place a different level of importance on each of the points on our list. The key is to communicate with your partner and understand what they value in a relationship.

So, now you know what men want, take these principles and apply them to your unique relationship for a stronger, happier, and more fulfilling connection. The key is to mix these principles with a man’s individual needs. Good luck!

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– Ben (INFJ) about Indy (ENFJ)

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